Walk for a... what?

You know what pisses me off slightly every time I hear it? These commercials of people talking about how they're Walking To Find A Cure for a given disease. Really? Walking to find a cure? Do they expect to find it sitting at the finish line?

Why don't they have "study to find a cure," as in do well in biology, chemistry, and biochemistry so then you can be a research scientist and actually do something tangible, direct, and real to "cure" the disease du jour?

But you know, it is so freakin' UNCOOL to be a scientist, whereas donning a stupid ribbon, hustling your friends and family for money, and then proceeding to walk in circles is totally the rage. First of all, unless you're an Olympic track star, getting someone to pay you to walk in circles and get nowhere is a ridiculous concept in and of itself. If it were modified, and say, we got a health insurance premium deduction for going to a gym regularly, it would be ok. But begging people for a few bucks so you can walk in circles? Sorry, no.

There are times, and this is one of them, when I start to think that some totally hot scientists need to do a scantily clad/nude spread in Esquire, or some other stupid rag, party like rock stars, and jazz it up so that we get some attention. Or someone should write a television show about the ups and downs of research science, and use grad school/research science as a setting for more sex, drugs, drama, and crazy shit. Sound familiar? Oh right, that's what Law and Order, Scrubs, House, Nip/Tuck, etc. do for other formerly geeky professions. It'll make science cooler, more people will do it, and then there will be more scientists in America, and we'll lead the world in scientific innovation. The current issue is all the scientists are coming here to get educated, and then taking their education back to wherever they're from. America has innovation out the wazoo, but we're seriously lazy entitled fucks who can't be bothered to live life without the television telling us what to do.

But this whole feeling good by not doing anything real about it - Walking To Help Find A Cure - strikes me as kind of bullshit. It's like... why not just skip the walking and those bloody stupid ribbons, donate some money, and get on with your life? Tutor some kid in science, or whatever gratis. That'll go farther.

I have no idea why, but these group feel-good sessions make me want to vomit. Maybe it's just because those of us in the trenches, like graduate students *ahem*, research scientists, and professors, as odd as some of us are, we're the ones doing the real work and we get absolutely zero glory, credit, or hot groupies giving us oral sex.